I want to read this message from time to time. It is so full of hope and love. At the grave site I thanked Stake President Hall for his beautiful message. He wanted me to know for sure that the message he gave was given to him by way of personal revelation.
Funeral Services for Brent Darren Marshall
Monday, February 6, 2012
Speaker: President Brian Hall
“Nearer My God to Thee.” I think that’s the desire of each one of us as we live our lives to every day and every minute be a little closer.
I appreciate the remarks, the music we have enjoyed thus far. I hope my remarks can be of benefit to you. I must tell Brother Marshall I’ll get even with him later. I don’t know why I’ve felt so deep a weight as I have felt as I have prepared for what I might say this morning.
It has been an incredible experience as word came when we were meeting as a stake presidency. Brother Marshall, of course, was away from us that evening. And a knock came on our door. And, the events of last Wednesday began to unfold and we began to be aware of what was happening. And there was an immediate outpouring of concern and love for this good family.
I’ve had the privilege to be with Brother Marshall now for a good many years. And, I have found him to be a man of incredible love; a man of integrity. And, one who will stand up and do what he needs to do in spite of what the cost might be. And it’s wonderful for me to see that he and his good wife have instilled those same characteristics in their children.
This morning it was still quite dark when my eyes came open and I lay awake thinking about what I had prepared and what we needed today. And some thoughts started to roll in. So I got up and wrote those down.
The Lord has said to us, “Thou shalt live together in love in so much that thou shalt weep for the loss of them that die.” And so if you’ve felt to weep, as we have, then we have done as the Lord has asked. You might ask yourselves, “Why would He ask us to so much that when we lose loved ones we would weep?” It hurts. It’s not fun. It tears at us. And the answer to that question is, “Does He not love us in such a manner? Does He not have that love for us?”
He wants us to become like Him and for whatever reason each of our lives have been specifically tailored to each of us. And, as I think about my interactions with Brent, and the Marshall family, I have been wondering why his walk through life was tailored as difficult as it was. And I could see the ever-spinning cycles in his life. Cycles that, at times, left him wondering if he was worth anything; other cycles where he might have felt pretty good about himself, only to encounter another cycle where he questioned his own validity and standing before the world and before God.
I don’t have the answer to why that was part of his challenge.
But, I do have a few answers. I don’t know all things. But, I realized as I struggled with where we are today and maybe some of the questions and doubts that have been engendered by some of his decisions and actions on that terrible night, I went to the 138th section of the Doctrine and Covenants. I love that section. It talks about the future. But, I found this.
“The dead,” and right now, Brent’s one of the dead. But, it’s not a finality. I think we do too much of that. When we say “dead” it’s kind of final. No. Death is but a portal; but a door; the doorway to the future. And he is now in what is called the great world of spirits or a world of the dead. They’re not with us. But they are yet very much alive.
“The dead who repent will be redeemed.” I find no equivocation there. Will be redeemed, “through obedience to the ordinances of the house of God,” (Doctrine and Covenants 138:58.) And I immediately rejoice, because I know that two parents went to the house of God before he was born and received the powers of the ordinances of the house of God. And those powers and blessings continue with Brent as we speak. They shall not be broken because I know these two. They’re not going to give up. As I visited with the Marshalls the next day, I saw in Sister Janice a quality that I always admire. It was that tiger attitude of a mother for her son. And she voiced that she would never give up. She would never quit loving him. He was forever hers. What a marvelous statement. That's the way we need to live our lives.
“And after they have paid the penalty of their transgressions,” speaking of the dead, “and are washed clean, shall receive a reward according to their works, for they are heirs of salvation” (Doctrine and Covenants 138:59.)
So, I think we have a tendency to quickly move to maybe a little bit of despair about the future. I would ask you not to do that, for we simply do not know. I do not know and you do not know. We have no way to understand the circles of Brent’s life. We have a tendency to view life of others in our own lens and microscope that we’ve been given. And, as we do so we look through a lens that’s dark. We’ll never know, ‘til we meet him again, and can embrace him.
I love the description as Enos has shown the righteous journey in the city of Enoch. And he said, “We will fall upon their necks, and they . . . upon our necks, and we will kiss each other” (Moses 7:63.) And I envision that occurring with you as you meet Brent.
Brigham Young said, “Let the father and mother, who are members of this Church and Kingdom, take a righteous course and strive with all their might never to do a wrong, . . .” Now remember he said “strive.” That doesn’t mean we achieve that. We are not perfect. But, “strive . . . never to do a wrong, but to do good all their lives; if they have one child or one hundred children, if they conduct themselves towards them as they should, binding them to the Lord by their faith and prayers, I care not where those children go, they are bound up to their parents by an everlasting tie, and no power of earth or hell can separate them from their parents in eternity: they will return again to the fountain from whence they sprang” (in Discourses of Brigham Young, 208.)
I think that’s the message I need to give to you today. It’s not about Brent right now. It’s about us and you. Will you be the one to not arrive home only to find him waiting for you there and you not home? That’s the message I’ve gained as I’ve studied what little we know about this part of life. I believe that as I have studied, we’re a little too cut and dry as we view the outcomes of our actions. We’re a little too black and white. Yet, we claim the privilege of being a little gray, because we’re not perfect. And, so I would ask you to take a focus on the future. Make sure you arrive where you should arrive, that you may be with him there. For each of us will have that privilege and opportunity to see him again. And to able to throw our arms around him and express to him our love.
This morning I had some thoughts that appeared to be from Brent. I can’t say that that’s for sure. But, that appeared to be the source. He would tell you that he loves you and that he now can feel the love in a way he has not been privileged to do so for a very long time because of his mortal condition. He loves you without the hindrances of that mortal condition. He would ask you to forgive him for all of the things of hurt he has caused you as he struggled with his life. And, he would ask you to forgive yourselves for the things that you may feel guilty about in relations that you have had with him. He would ask you to clear the slate and move forward. He would thank you for being his family. And, for always, even in the tough times, being there, even at times when you tried to help him understand things and maybe didn’t do as gracefully as you would like to. He would thank you for that. He would tell you to live with hope for that glorious reunion together.
He would ask you to learn to be slow to judge and quick to love. He saw that in his home and he would ask you to continue that. He would also want you to know that he’s busy. He’s not been sitting around. He’s already working on the things that he needs to clear up so that he might have that hope that he wants with each of you. He would ask you to remember the good things. I don't think I even need to go with that one. We’ve heard a lot of that today. He wasn’t perfect as none of us are prefect. Please remember the good things, keeping present in your lives with the stories that have already been told. It’s wonderful to see the family as they have.
And, he would ask you to remember that you are a family not by accident. And, as was stated in that first visit, I think it was, “Dad, we’re still a family of six.” Would that cover it? To which, I would say, “amen.” You will always be a family. It’s our opportunity now to live our lives in such a way that we can qualify for the blessings and be with him there; to go forward. We need to give us there. Then we’re going to worry about the other things. But, I promise you; you will feel him from time to time as you more forward. He is not without your family and he will be allowed those privileges from time to time to be one of the angels that are present as family is together in those special times. And, Janice, you’ll feel him. You haven’t lost your son. He will be with you.
In Psalms it says, “Sing unto the Lord, O ye saints of his, and give thanks at the remembrance of his holiness. For his anger endureth but a moment; in his favour is life: weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning” (Psalms 30:4-5.) I believe that it’s morning. We need to rejoice in all that we have, the things we were given by Brent Darren Marshall. Rejoice in the things that we know. What a comfort it is to know the plan of salvation. What a comfort it is to know that he’s okay; that he was greeted as he stepped out of this mortal life by those who love him. Of that I am confident and know. He has been tended to and continues to be so tended. And as he progresses you’ll be able to know of that.
Brothers and sisters, the Savior came and atoned for all of us. In spite of the actions or decisions that we make, He shall always love us. And if we will repent, His atonement can make up the difference. And we may yet have a bright hope of the glorious resurrection; of all of us together. That’s my hope. I want no empty chairs. I want us all to be there. May we take that determination to now so live our lives that we may all be together again is my prayer in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.
Monday, February 6, 2012
Speaker: President Brian Hall
“Nearer My God to Thee.” I think that’s the desire of each one of us as we live our lives to every day and every minute be a little closer.
I appreciate the remarks, the music we have enjoyed thus far. I hope my remarks can be of benefit to you. I must tell Brother Marshall I’ll get even with him later. I don’t know why I’ve felt so deep a weight as I have felt as I have prepared for what I might say this morning.
It has been an incredible experience as word came when we were meeting as a stake presidency. Brother Marshall, of course, was away from us that evening. And a knock came on our door. And, the events of last Wednesday began to unfold and we began to be aware of what was happening. And there was an immediate outpouring of concern and love for this good family.
I’ve had the privilege to be with Brother Marshall now for a good many years. And, I have found him to be a man of incredible love; a man of integrity. And, one who will stand up and do what he needs to do in spite of what the cost might be. And it’s wonderful for me to see that he and his good wife have instilled those same characteristics in their children.
This morning it was still quite dark when my eyes came open and I lay awake thinking about what I had prepared and what we needed today. And some thoughts started to roll in. So I got up and wrote those down.
The Lord has said to us, “Thou shalt live together in love in so much that thou shalt weep for the loss of them that die.” And so if you’ve felt to weep, as we have, then we have done as the Lord has asked. You might ask yourselves, “Why would He ask us to so much that when we lose loved ones we would weep?” It hurts. It’s not fun. It tears at us. And the answer to that question is, “Does He not love us in such a manner? Does He not have that love for us?”
He wants us to become like Him and for whatever reason each of our lives have been specifically tailored to each of us. And, as I think about my interactions with Brent, and the Marshall family, I have been wondering why his walk through life was tailored as difficult as it was. And I could see the ever-spinning cycles in his life. Cycles that, at times, left him wondering if he was worth anything; other cycles where he might have felt pretty good about himself, only to encounter another cycle where he questioned his own validity and standing before the world and before God.
I don’t have the answer to why that was part of his challenge.
But, I do have a few answers. I don’t know all things. But, I realized as I struggled with where we are today and maybe some of the questions and doubts that have been engendered by some of his decisions and actions on that terrible night, I went to the 138th section of the Doctrine and Covenants. I love that section. It talks about the future. But, I found this.
“The dead,” and right now, Brent’s one of the dead. But, it’s not a finality. I think we do too much of that. When we say “dead” it’s kind of final. No. Death is but a portal; but a door; the doorway to the future. And he is now in what is called the great world of spirits or a world of the dead. They’re not with us. But they are yet very much alive.
“The dead who repent will be redeemed.” I find no equivocation there. Will be redeemed, “through obedience to the ordinances of the house of God,” (Doctrine and Covenants 138:58.) And I immediately rejoice, because I know that two parents went to the house of God before he was born and received the powers of the ordinances of the house of God. And those powers and blessings continue with Brent as we speak. They shall not be broken because I know these two. They’re not going to give up. As I visited with the Marshalls the next day, I saw in Sister Janice a quality that I always admire. It was that tiger attitude of a mother for her son. And she voiced that she would never give up. She would never quit loving him. He was forever hers. What a marvelous statement. That's the way we need to live our lives.
“And after they have paid the penalty of their transgressions,” speaking of the dead, “and are washed clean, shall receive a reward according to their works, for they are heirs of salvation” (Doctrine and Covenants 138:59.)
So, I think we have a tendency to quickly move to maybe a little bit of despair about the future. I would ask you not to do that, for we simply do not know. I do not know and you do not know. We have no way to understand the circles of Brent’s life. We have a tendency to view life of others in our own lens and microscope that we’ve been given. And, as we do so we look through a lens that’s dark. We’ll never know, ‘til we meet him again, and can embrace him.
I love the description as Enos has shown the righteous journey in the city of Enoch. And he said, “We will fall upon their necks, and they . . . upon our necks, and we will kiss each other” (Moses 7:63.) And I envision that occurring with you as you meet Brent.
Brigham Young said, “Let the father and mother, who are members of this Church and Kingdom, take a righteous course and strive with all their might never to do a wrong, . . .” Now remember he said “strive.” That doesn’t mean we achieve that. We are not perfect. But, “strive . . . never to do a wrong, but to do good all their lives; if they have one child or one hundred children, if they conduct themselves towards them as they should, binding them to the Lord by their faith and prayers, I care not where those children go, they are bound up to their parents by an everlasting tie, and no power of earth or hell can separate them from their parents in eternity: they will return again to the fountain from whence they sprang” (in Discourses of Brigham Young, 208.)
I think that’s the message I need to give to you today. It’s not about Brent right now. It’s about us and you. Will you be the one to not arrive home only to find him waiting for you there and you not home? That’s the message I’ve gained as I’ve studied what little we know about this part of life. I believe that as I have studied, we’re a little too cut and dry as we view the outcomes of our actions. We’re a little too black and white. Yet, we claim the privilege of being a little gray, because we’re not perfect. And, so I would ask you to take a focus on the future. Make sure you arrive where you should arrive, that you may be with him there. For each of us will have that privilege and opportunity to see him again. And to able to throw our arms around him and express to him our love.
This morning I had some thoughts that appeared to be from Brent. I can’t say that that’s for sure. But, that appeared to be the source. He would tell you that he loves you and that he now can feel the love in a way he has not been privileged to do so for a very long time because of his mortal condition. He loves you without the hindrances of that mortal condition. He would ask you to forgive him for all of the things of hurt he has caused you as he struggled with his life. And, he would ask you to forgive yourselves for the things that you may feel guilty about in relations that you have had with him. He would ask you to clear the slate and move forward. He would thank you for being his family. And, for always, even in the tough times, being there, even at times when you tried to help him understand things and maybe didn’t do as gracefully as you would like to. He would thank you for that. He would tell you to live with hope for that glorious reunion together.
He would ask you to learn to be slow to judge and quick to love. He saw that in his home and he would ask you to continue that. He would also want you to know that he’s busy. He’s not been sitting around. He’s already working on the things that he needs to clear up so that he might have that hope that he wants with each of you. He would ask you to remember the good things. I don't think I even need to go with that one. We’ve heard a lot of that today. He wasn’t perfect as none of us are prefect. Please remember the good things, keeping present in your lives with the stories that have already been told. It’s wonderful to see the family as they have.
And, he would ask you to remember that you are a family not by accident. And, as was stated in that first visit, I think it was, “Dad, we’re still a family of six.” Would that cover it? To which, I would say, “amen.” You will always be a family. It’s our opportunity now to live our lives in such a way that we can qualify for the blessings and be with him there; to go forward. We need to give us there. Then we’re going to worry about the other things. But, I promise you; you will feel him from time to time as you more forward. He is not without your family and he will be allowed those privileges from time to time to be one of the angels that are present as family is together in those special times. And, Janice, you’ll feel him. You haven’t lost your son. He will be with you.
In Psalms it says, “Sing unto the Lord, O ye saints of his, and give thanks at the remembrance of his holiness. For his anger endureth but a moment; in his favour is life: weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning” (Psalms 30:4-5.) I believe that it’s morning. We need to rejoice in all that we have, the things we were given by Brent Darren Marshall. Rejoice in the things that we know. What a comfort it is to know the plan of salvation. What a comfort it is to know that he’s okay; that he was greeted as he stepped out of this mortal life by those who love him. Of that I am confident and know. He has been tended to and continues to be so tended. And as he progresses you’ll be able to know of that.
Brothers and sisters, the Savior came and atoned for all of us. In spite of the actions or decisions that we make, He shall always love us. And if we will repent, His atonement can make up the difference. And we may yet have a bright hope of the glorious resurrection; of all of us together. That’s my hope. I want no empty chairs. I want us all to be there. May we take that determination to now so live our lives that we may all be together again is my prayer in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.
